FIESTA!!

Perhaps you watched Monday's Fiesta Bowl. Well if you didn't, thankfully for you, I am here to recap it for you in all its glory. I will accept a fruit basket as thanks. Just e-mail it to me.

FIESTA BOWL

I hope you had a big bag of hint of lime Tostitos on hand for this one, because they're delicious. I used to have a big bag of Tostitos on hand while watching the Fiesta Bowl after I received a free sample of their Tostitos Gold chips at the 2003 National Title Game. The Buckeyes won and thus my love affair with Tostitos began. Then the Buckeyes went back there in 2007 and Florida kicked their butt. And now Texas beat them this year, so I say fuck you Tostitos. I do it myself.

What a storybook ending to the game though. In fact, its so much of a storybook ending that you can actually buy the storybook now. The book is called "How Colt Hooked the Bucks." This game was also such a storybook ending that even though Texas didn't get that first down on 4th and 3 on the game winning drive, they gave it to them anyways. Not because the refs like Texas better, but because a title for the book had already been written after the third quarter and they had already started filling orders on Amazon, so tough shit Buckeyes. Plus "Buck You, ESPN for saying we suck" was simply not an appealing title for a storybook.

Little know fact about Texas' hero Colt McCoy. He was actually recruited to be the Texas QB as soon as his parents filed his birth certificate. The school though his name was such a perfect fit for the QB at Texas that they just had to have him. The coach at the time, Fred Akers, offered the baby a scholarship just five days after Colt's birth. Colt only gave a verbal commitment, obviously, but his future was set in stone right then.

You might think Colt has the perfect QB name, however, a recent ESPN.com poll asking who had the perfect QB name had Colt placing second. The results were as follows (in reverse order, to build suspense): Sonny Sixkiller (Washington QB in the 70's), Joe Bradley (nearly lead the California Univ. Condors to the Rose Bowl, before having to quit the team due to a heart condition), Johnny Handsome (Joe Montana's backup at Notre Dame), Colt McCoy, and Blondie McWhitey (he's still in high school, but everyone wants him because everyone wants a blonde white boy QB).

OTHER NEWS BULLETINS

- Even though it was Marvin Harrison's gun that was fired at a guy near Marvin Harrison's bar and Marvin Harrison's car wash and even though Marvin Harrison had got into a fist fight with the guy who was shot by Marvin Harrison's gun, apparently the Philly DA didn't have enough evidence to file charges against Marvin Harrison. I guess that makes sense.

- The Attorney General of Utah is looking into whether the BCS violates antitrust law. First of all, sports are exempt from antitrust laws. Even I know that. Second of all, sounds like sour grapes. Third of all, I think its time to find a new AG for Utah because this guy is wasting taxpayer money big time.

- Apparently new Yankee 1B Mark Teixeira decided to go to NYC because his wife said he should. I don't even have a joke here. That's funny enough on its own. What a pussy whipped mother fucker. Can't wait until she here's the Yankee faithful boo him soundly for grounding into an inning ending double play. Then she'll feel good I bet. Mark will have to pay A-Rod money too, because that's his trademark play.