Before we begin, just a quick explanation of what you'll get here, since this is my first post. Basically I thought it might be interesting to break down the top stories of the day in the world of sports, but without using facts or reasoning skills to do so. We'll see what happens.
Two games on the slate today. Two more reasons for people to gamble their families futures away simply to make watching a football game slightly more enticing.
Two games on the slate today. Two more reasons for people to gamble their families futures away simply to make watching a football game slightly more enticing.
Falcons - Cardinals
I could break this down for you, but wouldn't you rather hear the thoughts that crossed the mind of Cards backup QB Matt Leinart as this game unfolded? I thought so.
Kurt Warner throws 42-yd TD pass to Larry Fitzgerald - Matt thinks - That guy's old enough to be my dad. Actually he might be old enough to be my grandfather. But he's better than I'll ever be.
Kurt Warner throws 71-yd TD pass to Anquan Boldin - Matt thinks - That old guy used to be bagging groceries to help pay his bills. I used to be bagging two or three super hot chicks at once. Is that ironic? Guess I should have paid attention in school. Now if I get injured I'll have to bag groceries to pay the bills. That's ironic, right?
Matt Ryan throws 2-yd TD pass to Justin Peelle - Matt thinks - I wonder if anyone would call the cops to go and find me if I started acting funny like Vince Young did?
Antrel Rolle recovers a fumble and takes it 27 yds for a TD - Matt thinks - If every Cardinals game next year was on Monday Night Football, how many games would it take for me to be a part of ESPN's delightful feature, For Love or the Game? And since I don't have a wife or a girlfriend could I have my favorite stripper from my local after hours Gentleman's Club participate?
Game ends and the stadium announcer says "thanks for joining us at University of Phoenix Stadium" - Matt thinks - I wonder if the chicks at the University of Phoenix are hot? I should check out their campus tomorrow.
Colts - Chargers
The backups for these teams aren't nearly as funny as Matt Leinart, so I'll actually talk about the game a little here. I wasn't really watching the game that much so you'll have to excuse me if some of my accoutn of the game is a bit inaccurate. However, that is what I was going for, so I take that back.
The game started normally enough. Peyton Manning and the Colts got the usual 5 or 6 calls that went their way thanks to Peyton being the face of the league and for not telling anyone what he saw Paul Taglibue doing after the Super Bowl seven years ago. They even got the league to break LT's groin simply to get him out of the game. However, the Chargers had planned for this and had on hand a midget that they could put in the game to run circles around the significantly taller players of the Colts. It was like that time they put in that midget to play baseball and he got walked on four pitches because he was so short and then went on to bite the ankles of the first baseman and was ejected. The Chargers midget didn't bite anyone, in fact he was significantly more successful. He accounted for all the yards the Chargers had in the game, even the ones that were gained before he entered the game. However, it wasn't enough and the game finished tied. Both teams were tired though and it was late and they all wanted to get out and enjoy the club scene in San Diego so they decided to play Rock Paper Scissors to determine the winner. Peyton chose scissors (which he later used to cut that meat!!) while the midget chose to bite Peyton's hand. It started to bleed and so he couldn't continue and thus the Chargers won.
The game started normally enough. Peyton Manning and the Colts got the usual 5 or 6 calls that went their way thanks to Peyton being the face of the league and for not telling anyone what he saw Paul Taglibue doing after the Super Bowl seven years ago. They even got the league to break LT's groin simply to get him out of the game. However, the Chargers had planned for this and had on hand a midget that they could put in the game to run circles around the significantly taller players of the Colts. It was like that time they put in that midget to play baseball and he got walked on four pitches because he was so short and then went on to bite the ankles of the first baseman and was ejected. The Chargers midget didn't bite anyone, in fact he was significantly more successful. He accounted for all the yards the Chargers had in the game, even the ones that were gained before he entered the game. However, it wasn't enough and the game finished tied. Both teams were tired though and it was late and they all wanted to get out and enjoy the club scene in San Diego so they decided to play Rock Paper Scissors to determine the winner. Peyton chose scissors (which he later used to cut that meat!!) while the midget chose to bite Peyton's hand. It started to bleed and so he couldn't continue and thus the Chargers won.
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